Sure I miss it, but my aim is getting better.

Any player can have an off night. If you happen to be a player that has to provide a lot of offense for your team to win, you can have a really off night. This post is about those really off nights. We're going to talk about three different top 10 lists: most missed FGs, FTs and 3Ps during the regular season of 2008-2009.

Top 10 Most FG Misses in a Game

First, let's talk about missed field goals. Dwyane Wade, Kobe Bryant and Russell Westbrook tied for first. Each had a game last season where they missed a whopping 21 shots from the field. Each player was on the visiting team and the visiting team lost each time.

Other players appearing on this list are Chris Bosh and LeBron James. Wait a second, that's only 5 total players! Well, Dwyane Wade appears on the list a second time. On March 14th, 2009 the Heat played the Jazz and Wade scored 50 points going 19 of 39 from the field. That's right. He missed 20 shots in the game but still shot almost 50% from the field. That sounds like a lot of shots and I guess it us, but Wilt Chamberlain attempted 63 shots in his famous 100 point game. By the way, the Heat won 140 to 129.

So what about the other 4 spots on this dubious top 10 list? They all belong to the Black Mamba. Mr. Bryant accounts for 5 of the 10 spots on the list. In each case the Lakers were the visiting team and went 2-3. Kobe took 163 shots during those 5 games and made 65 of them giving him a shooting percentage just shy of 40% . This shouldn't be taken as a Kobe-Bashing post by any stretch. Sure, he takes lots of shots sometimes but the Lakers won the championship last year. Most nights he makes those shots.

Top 10 Most FT Misses in a Game

No real surprises here. Dwight Howard takes the top 3 spots. Shaq comes in at number 4. Mr. Howard also takes 5 and 6. Emeka Okafor is 7th, Corey Maggette is 8th, Shaq again at 9th and Josh Smith turned in an abysmal 20% from the FT line going 2 of 10.

Top 10 Most 3P Misses in a Game

What do the top 10 Most Misses for a 3 Point Shot have in common? The same thing as the top 13 Most Misses from the 3 point arc. Each player tied for the most misses with 9. Jason Terry shot the most 3s on the list with 16 attempts but he made 7 of them for a 3P% of 43.75. Not bad. Ray Allen and Ron Artest each took the least amount of shots on the list with 9, which means they missed every single 3 pointer they attempted. The title of the recap for Artest's 0-9 night reads, "Artest, Rockets overcome Yao's absence, end Hornets' five-game home streak". Sometimes it's better to be lucky than good.

Full spreadsheet can be found here.

Hoop Tomes

I have several posts in the hopper and I'm working on some fun stuff to do once the season starts (will this season ever start?). One of the reasons that I haven't been able to finish writing my posts about the NBA is that I have been doing a lot of reading about the NBA. I recently read, The Rivalry: Bill Russell, Wilt Chamberlain, and the Golden Age of Basketball. An amazing book. I could not put it down. Take a look at this image:

See that? See Wilt Chamberlain stretching out over Bill Russell...did the shot go in or did Russell block it? This kind of match-up transformed the NBA into a game that was much closer to what we see today. Before these two guys came along, you didn't see this kind of thing happening in the league. The ebb and flow of the game was different. The man to man match ups were different. But when those two athletes, one who could score whenever he wanted and one who could stop who ever he wanted, went head to head for the first time on November 7th, 1959, the game changed. Make that Changed.

This book also has great sections on Walter Brown, Red Auerbach, Bob Cousy, Thomas Heinsohn, Jerry West and Elgin Baylor.

It does not shy away from the racism of the 60s and the remnants of Jim Crow. This was during a time when black players were cheered from the stands but told they could not stay with the white players in the hotel in town. These kinds of clashes were peculiar to basketball at the time. It was way ahead of the rest of the country when it came to racial integration and to a degree, racial reconciliation.

So that's my big push. If you read one book about the NBA in your life, read the Rivalry by John Taylor. You will not be disappointed.

Here's a list of other NBA books that I've read and enjoyed. Take a look and buy one for yourself or that special NBA fan in your life. You'll also be putting a tiny (every so tiny) amount of $ the Hoop Geek's pocket.

Basketball on Paper: Rules and Tools for Performance Analysis	This book is heavy on numbers but it gives a great insight into today's game with a big emphasis on team statistics as well as detailed looks at the abilities of individual players. There a lot of knowledge and numbers in Dean Oliver's book so take it slow and give yourself time to soak it up.
Basketball on Paper: Rules and Tools for Performance Analysis	I bought this book as a gift for a friend of mine but I made the mistake of reading the first few pages and...he did get it but it was a late present. Mr. Spike Lee writes a pretty good hoop book. I like reading books from guys like Spike. It's basketball, he's a fan and he talks about the game like a fan would. He also writes about sitting next to Woody Allen at Knicks games and compliments Mr. Allen on his hoop geekery (my words, not his). It's been a while since I read it but I think he insinuates that Penny Hardaway was better than Michael Jordan at the time and that he thought Michael Jordan agreed with him but wouldn't come out and say it. What? To quote Marvelous Mars Blackman, "Money! Why you wanna do me like that?" Stop reading and watch that commercial again. A classic.
Rare Air: Michael on Michael	This book is out of print now but it's worth it if you can get your hands on one. I'm going to have to buy one myself because one night I knocked over a glass of water and it went all over my copy. It's a picture book of Michael Jordan's career. It's not thick, but the pages are big. Some great quotes in there too. Be sure to check the commentary on some of the pictures in the back.
The Jordan Rules	Ah, the Jordan Rules. Mr. Smith stirred up a lot of controversy when this one came out. Here is my overriding thought on this book, he shouldn't have written it like he did. Here's why: When people are among family and friends, they say things that they would not say in public and certainly not to the media. One of the things that makes civilization work is that people realize that some of thoughts should be kept to one's self or one's inner circle. Everybody reading this knows what I'm talking about. You know how pissed off you would be if some one in your inner circle decided to write a book about things you blabbed in un-guarded moments. That is what I think happened here. Mr. Smith worked hard to get in that inner circle but it wasn't to be a friend, it was so he could write a book and make money off another person's trust. I think Mr. Smith was wrong to print some of the stuff he was privy to but that being said, it's still a great book.
Sacred Hoops: Spiritual Lessons of a Hardwood Warrior	It's hard for a Maverick's fan to be Phil Jackson fan since during his time with the Lakers he has orchestrated some down right embarrassing beatings of the Mavs. Then during one of the rare times when Dallas was beating them handily...Phil called time out in the final minute of the game. And don't get me started about what happened on December 6th, 2002. I'm still not over that. But after reading Scared Hoops, I've changed my mind. I'm not a hater anymore, I'm no Laker fan...that's for dang sure, but I'm a Phil Jackson fan. Sacred Hoops is a great story about his early life, his days as a player and how his concept of true team basketball evolved over the course of his life. The Zen stuff is pretty interesting too.
Sports Illustrated: The Basketball Book	This is a big coffee table sized book but you will pick it up and flip through each page. Great photographs and nice way to look at how the game evolved from Dr. Naismith's 13 rules to what we have today.

One last thing about the olden days. Check out this Youtube video of Wilt Chamberlain at age 17. The narrator's line at the end is classic, "Remeber the name Wilt Chamberlain. It will probably make big sports copy for years to come..."

If you are reading this on Facebook, click here to view the video.

The Rivalry That Never Was

I am still not sure what was going through Michael Jordan's head when he gave his Hall of Fame acceptance speech. So many times during Kobe Bryant's career I would think, "He doesn't get the media aspect. Jordan always knew how to handle the media." But on September 11th, 2009, when Michael Jordan was up there takings shots at people, I found myself thinking, "Kobe would have done that better." (Now that I think about it, I wonder what Kobe Bryant's speech will be like when he is inducted into the Hall of Fame many years from now...)

Let's get back to Jordan's speech and his reminiscing about Byron Russell. Here is the quote:

“I was in Chicago in 1994 … and at this time I had no thoughts of coming back and playing the game of basketball. Bryon Russell came over to me and said, ‘Why’d you quit? You know I could guard you. If I ever see you in a pair of shorts …’

“When I did come back in 1995 and we played Utah in ‘96, I’m at the center circle and Bryon Russell is standing next to me. I said, ‘You remember the [comments] you made in 1994 about, ‘I think I can guard you, I can shut you down, I would love to play against you? Well, you’re about to get your chance.’ “ -Yahoo Sports

Then there was the retort by Mr. Russell:

“I’ll play his a— right now,” Russell told Yahoo! Sports. “This is a call-out for him to come play me. He can come out here in his private jet and come play. He’s got millions of dollars. He can pay for the jet. He can meet me at the Recreation Center in Calabasas.

Why did Mr. Jordan bring that up? What difference does it make? Doesn't Michael know he is the greatest ever? Byron Russell never even made the All Star game. Compared to the mighty MJ, he is a nobody and everyone knows that. Why didn't Michael take a page from Kobe's book and say, "Do I know this guy? I don't know this guy..."

It didn't make any sense. But what really does not make any sense to me is Byron Russell calling him out after the speech. You're challenging Michael Jordan now? NOW? Now that he's 46 years old and out of shape? Now you want to prove something? It's too late Mr. Russell. You had your chance, make that chances to shut down Michael Jordan. Let's take a look and see how that worked...

First, a little prologue. Byron Russell played his first NBA game on November 5th, 1993. In his debut he played 1 minute and had a goose egg across all statistical categories.

Michael Jordan had already played 667 regular season games before Mr. Russell got his first minute of playing time. In 1993, Michael Jordan had three championship rings, had been named league MVP three times, had been named All-NBA 1st team nine times, been named Defensive Player of the Year, named to the All-Defensive First Team six times, nine All Star games, been named All Star MVP, won an Olympic gold medal and an NCAA Championship. Michael Jordan had achieved all this before Byron Russell got his first minute of NBA PT.

This was what Michael Jordan had accomplished when Byron Russell said, "Why’d you quit? You know I could guard you." Who is this kid...right?

Jordan did come back and he did play the Jazz several times. How did that turn out? MJ returned for the tale end of the 94-95 season and by that time the Jazz had already played both of their games with the Bulls, so there was no match up that year. Utah won both of those games.

But after that...

• 95-96 The Bulls won the first game 90-85. Jordan had 34 points on 14 of 17 shooting. The Bulls also won the second game with Jordan scoring 30 points.
• 96-97 Byron Russell gets some respectable minutes against the Bulls in the 1st game. Utah won the game win 105 to 100. However, Jordan scored 44 points on 17 of 32 shooting. The Bulls took the second game 102-89 with Jordan putting up a rather pedestrian 23 points.

The Jazz met the Bulls in the NBA Finals that year. The Bulls won it in 6 games. Jordan scored point totals that went 31,38, 26, 22, 38, 39.

• 97-98 The Jazz win both regular season games. Jordan scored 32 points in the first game and 40 in the second.

Again the Jazz met the Bulls in the Finals only this time the Jazz had home court. Same result. Bulls win it in 6. Jordan scored point totals that went 33, 37, 24, 34, 28, 45. Here's a look at points 44 and 45 at the end of game six:

Jordan retired and came back as a Wizard in 2001. This was an older, slower Jordan and Russell is now and established player. Now we're going to see the shut down Byron alluded to in 1994. The first match up between the Jazz and the Wizards occurred on November 16th, 2001. The Jazz won the game and Jordan....scored 44 points going 17 of 33 from the field.

Finally on March 21st, 2002...the Jazz and Russell were not torched by Jordan. Michael came off the bench, played 22 minutes and scored 11 points going 4 of 12 from the field. The Jazz won 94-79.

The Jazz and Wizards split the series in the 2002-2003 season. Jordan retired for the 3rd and final time. He scored 19 points in the win and 11 points in the loss. It seems that at long last the Jazz figured out how to keep Jordan under 20 points. The irony is that Byron Russell had nothing to do with it. In 2002-2003 he did not play for the Utah Jazz. He mostly came off the bench for...the Washington Wizards.

Michael Jordan's career scoring average is 30.4 point per game. In the twenty games that Jordan played against Russell, he averaged 32.65 points per game so Jordan actually did better than average when he played against teams with Byron Russell.

It was never a rivalry. Honestly, I don't know why either one of them brought it up.

Didn't you get that memo?

"The NBA's labor agreement with the referees' union expired Sept. 1, and no new talks have been scheduled since Stern angrily and abruptly ended a formal bargaining session last Tuesday." - ESPN



It looks like we are in for scrub referees if they cannot get things worked out.



One thing is certain, they will soon be here. They cannot be stopped. And I for one welcome our new substitute referee overlords.


These are trying economic times. Everybody is cutting back. New Referee Orientation might get cut short. Maybe instead of flying them all to a sweet conference in Las Vegas the league decided to bring the new zebras up to speed by having a "webinar" instead. If refs are like the rest of us they probably play solitaire or watch Hulu instead of the exhilarating web cam view of some NBA exec flipping charts.


But for whatever reason, call it fate, call it luck, call it karma...I believe everything happens for a reason. I believe we were meant to have scrub refs this season. For what purpose? To make up the rules...ourselves.


Listen up NBA players. Learn these ten rules, band together and insist that this is the way things are run now.

1. No more 3 pointers. It's now a 3.25 pointer.
2. All players are to be addressed by the referee as "Sensei".
3. Greg Oden is allowed 10 fouls per game.
4. All visiting players must wear the blast shield down when shooting free throws.
5. Rollerblades must be worn during overtime. This applies to the referees as well.
6. Referees must notify the scoring table of a foul by using Twitter from a list of approved devices. (Example)
7. The head referee is required to wear a band-aid over the back of his/her neck.
8. Flagrant two fouls will land the offending player in a hockey style penalty box that will be suspended above the court.
9. Once per game, a player may invoke the, "I wasn't trying my hardest" exception and require a do over of the previous possession.
10. Instead of being ejected, a coach can submit to being tasered by the opposing team's coach.

Try it guys. This could be fun.

Bad Teams

Some teams bounce off the bottom of the standings and head back to respectability. Other teams stick the to bottom of the standings and just never seem to get it together.

This is going to be one of the few posts I will write a bad team. In fact, it's about the worst team in the NBA for 2008-2009. I am talking about the Sacramento (formerly of Rochester, Cincinnati and Kansas City) Kings. Gone are the days when Chris Webber, Mike Bibby, Vlade Divac and Doug Christie pushed the Lakers to 7 games in the 2002 playoffs. Last year the sad Sac Kings were a woeful 17-65. That's a winning percentage of just over 20%. What went wrong?

A lot of things. Ron Artest was gone. Kevin Martin missed 31 games. They could not rebound and the could not defend the 3 (Orlando set a record for most 3s in a game...in Arco). The new kids on the team weren't able to pick things up. It's tough learning on the fly in the West where all eight playoffs positions are fiercely contested. Twenty-one different players played for the Kings during the 2008-2009 season. I don't have the stats compiled to tell you where that ranks among all thirty teams, but I can tell you that the Lakers and Magic only played 16 players each in '08-'09. Continuity seems counts.

But what is the cause and what is the effect? Are bad teams made worse because of all the shuffling of players or are they already bad and the shuffling happens as management tries to find a way to string together some wins? Does management want to string together wins if they have a shot at a lottery pick? There are a lot of variables that go on behind the scenes that we at fans can only guess at. Which brings me to the players on worst team, specifically, the best player on the worst team.

Kevin Martin was the best player for Sacramento in '08-'09, but how do you know if the best player on a bad team is really that good? The reason I question Kevin Martin at all, and Kevin Durant and Rudy Gay, is that they are all on bad teams. Somebody has to lead the team in scoring. It doesn't necessarily mean that they are a great players. Time will tell if Kevin Martin and the other basement stars will rise. I think most of them will. But it's perplexing to watch. Do their teams lose because other teams know they can double team the best player and shut them down because no one else will be able to pick up the slack? Or, do other teams just play them straight up because even if the best player does go off, no one else is going to be a legitimate 2nd or 3rd scoring threat, so the game will be in hand either way? How well would that player do if they were traded to a playoff team. The variables are piling up in my head.

You just have to suffer through the bad seasons and hope things get better. As a Dallas fan, I can assure you that the bad times can seem like they go on forever (see the 90s). But that is why bad teams draft higher. That is one boon to finishing last is that you have a better chance at picking first, or close to it. You might get LeBron James or you might get Kwame Brown, but hopefully you get help putting together a winner that fills the arenas. The team has to win to get anywhere. No one knows you when you are down and out. Take Kevin Durant for example. In all seriousness, I think he is a fantastic player, but it's all happening below the radar because the Thunder are a bad team. According to Kevin Durant's own twitter feed, when he tells people he plays basketball for the NBA, people tell him, "Keep working hard and you'll someday you'll be in the NBA."

Let's take a look at the last ten seasons and what happened to the teams that finished last:

• 1999-2000 Clippers finish 15-67. Drafted Darius Miles at #3 pick. Next year: 31-51
• 2000-2001 Bulls finish 15-67. Drafted Eddy Curry with #4 pick. Next year: 21-61
• 2001-2002 Bulls & Warriors finish 21-61. Bulls take Jay Williams at #2 and finish the next season at 30-52. Warriors take Mike Dunleavey at #3 and finish next season at 38-44)
• 2002-2003 Cavaliers and Nuggets both first 17-65. The Cavs take LeBron James with the #1 pick and improve to 35-47 the next year. Five years later they are in the NBA finals. The Nuggets took Carmelo Anthony at #3 and made the playoffs the next year with a winning record of 43-39.
• 2003-2004 Orlando finished 21-61 and drafted the next Superman, Dwight Howard with the #1 pick in the draft. Next season they finish 36-46. Five years later they are in the NBA finals.
• 2004-2005 Atlanta 13-69. The Hawks take Marvin Williams at #2 overall and improve to 26-56 the next season.
• 2005-2006 Portland finishes 21-61 and take LeMarcus Aldridge with the #2 pick. Portland improves to 32-50 the next season. Three years later the Blazers are the #4 seed in the West.
• 2006-2007 Memphis Grizzlies finish 22-60 take Mike Conley with #4. Next Memphis finishes year Memphis finish at 22-60.
• 2007-2008 Miami finishes at 15-67 take Michael Beasley. Next season they improve to a winning record of 43-39 which is enough to get them the 5th seed in the East. Dwyane Wade coming back from injury helped a little too.
• 2008-2009 Sacramento finishes 17-65. They select Tyreke Evans with the #4 pick. What happens in 2009-2010 is any body's guess.

Here's mine. It'll be tough for them to make the post season. The top 8, possibly 9 spots in the West will shuffle but I won't be any new teams in the mix. The Kings only real hope is to get another good draft pick. To get that, they must remain in the cellar for another year, like Edmund Dantes imprisoned in Chatea d'If in the Count of Monte Cristo. Perhaps the Maloof Family can put together something for the Free Agent Bonanza of Aught Ten. Lots of cap room available in 2011...

Players in the League go Tweet, Tweet, Tweet

Twitter has arrived in the NBA. Actually, it arrived a while ago. Now it's almost common among NBA players. There have been some hiccups along the way. Charlie Villanueva (info) tweeted during half time of a game. Coach Skiles was not happy about the timing of the tweet release. J.R. Smith and Michael Beasely have both had their accounts shut down because of content. I still don't quite get the deal with JR Smith(story). There must be more to this story than I know about because it seems that all he did was substitute K for C in some tweet and some how that was interpreted as "signaling a gang affiliation" or some such. Mr. Smith has made some poor choices along the way, but I think this Twitter/gang thing was overblown. Anyway, Mr. Smith's tweetin' days are over. Michael Beasely just needed help and let's all hope he's getting it now(story).

What does the Twitter phenomenon mean for the NBA? The upcoming year will be the first year that a lot of NBA players on Twitter. It's obvious from the tweets of some players that they were told to sighn up by other NBA players. Shaq made it cool and now everyone is literally following the Big Tweeter. Holy crap! Did just come up with a new nick name for Shaq? (Quick Google search....No. It's been done). What is it going to be like during the season when the trash talking starts? What's it going to be like when a player is assigned a flagrant foul that they don't think was justified? What about a dirty play by another player or a bad call from a ref? What if some player drunk tweets about a twitpic during a playoff run?

The main stream media is often maligned for the way it chooses to report on events. But one important job the media does is that it protects public figures from themselves (most of the time). It also gives the world a filtered view of what a person is really like. Tiger Woods is revered all over the world, but he can cuss a blue streak when he hits a bad shot. But what he says on the course isn't reported on much in the media. Now, if he did the same thing during a post tournament interview, that would be another story. That would be a story. But golf fans get a filtered view of Mr. Woods and he gets to maintain his clean image in the lucrative world of endorsements. But the filter is breaking down now, even for Mr. Woods. Ten years ago I would have been hard put to get my hands on a video clip of him cursing on live TV. I found the above link in less than 10 seconds.

That's the thing about this brave new world of Twitter, Twitpic and Twitvid. Now, NBA players can say what they want with no filter getting in the way. Everyone carries a mobile phone. It's easy to T9 a few words to your thousands of Twitter followers...instantly. No PR person from the organization says yea or nay. There's no TV guy waiting to drop your statement if you use an F bomb or make any sort of inappropriate remark.

Personally I love it.

I can see what a player says in an unfiltered manner and I (along with thousands of other bloggers) can write my own stories using actual player quotes. I no longer have to be in the locker room to get a quote. I can get that from my lap top while watching League Pass. I think the quotes might be better coming from Twitter anyway. Most of the half time interviews and post game comments are boring beyond belief. I will at some point do a post on the banality of the half time interview.

But let's move on from the possible implications of Twitter and professional sports. What is happening? What do these guys actually talk about?

It's not as exciting as you might think. It is the off-season after all.

The two main things that NBA players Tweet about is working out and eating. By far. That's what these guys do. They go to the gym and shoot jump shots, play in pick up games, lift weights with conditioning coaches and then talk about where they are going to eat and what they are going to eat when they get there (pictures are sometimes provided). These guys work hard. I am sure there's some partying and other stuff going on that they don't Tweet about, but for the most part these guys are very focused on being incredible NBA players. Sure, they drive in nice cars and go home to nice houses, but they don't spend that much time in them even during the off season.

Some players with Twitter accounts do not Tweet much at all. Dirk Nowitzki (info) is rarely Tweets and when he does, half of them are in German. His last Tweet was on September 2nd, "having an excellent time at Basketball without Borders, stay tuned for updates from Africa". Dirk is an international player and has traveled all over the world so, while I'm sure he's glad to be doing what he's doing in South Africa, the novelty of traveling to another country has probably worn off for him by now. His Tweets are a little on the boring side.

But Dirk wasn't the only player from the NBA in South Africa. There were several others and for two in particular, the novelty of traveling has definitely not worn off. Let's look at a conversation that occurred between two NBA All Stars on September 1st of 2009.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: Chris Bosh and Dwight Howard:

Dwight Howard:Hey world. We jus landed. This Is gonna be funnnnnn. Yuuuaaaaa

So he's excited. Fair enough. It's his first trip to Africa so being a little hype is expected.

Dwight Howard: Guess who met me off the plane. King jaffi and prince Hakeem

For those of you who don't know, Mr. Howard is referring to two characters from the movie Coming to America.

Dwight Howard: Lol http://twitvid.com/5116B

Mr. Howard is having fun with the gadgets. The accents are strange to him. For some reason he keep referring to the gentleman in this video as "Elvis."

Dwight Howard: Yalll this hotel is soooooooo fieeeeeee

I'm not sure what "fieeee...." means but I think it can be assumed that Mr. Howard is impressed by and approves of the accommodations. Next it's on to dinner. From what I can gather, Chris Bosh and Dwight Howard were seated close to each other, but not so close that they could converse without being overheard. Thank goodness they both have PDAs.

Chris Bosh: Eating dinner with @dwighthoward and the rest of the staff at basketball without borders in south africa!!

So the dinner is underway. Things seem to be going well but it appears that Mr. Howard has been seated next to some one who has a gift for the gab. Twenty minutes later Mr. Howard is calling for help....

Dwight Howard: @chrisbosh chris help meeeee. Lol he talkin my ear off. Lol

Now, keep in mind that both players are talking to someone near them while texting away to each other. Mr. Bosh sees that Mr. Howard as been cornered by a conversation ninja, but declines to provide aid.

Chris Bosh: @DwightHoward I'm sorry dude. Can't help you with that one homie

Homie is still in use? Surely not. Perhaps Mr. Bosh is more old school that I realized.

Dwight Howard: (Responds, but this Tweet has been deleted).

I'm pretty sure I know why. I saw this happen live so I know what he wrote, but since he deleted it, I'll leave it out. Anyway, the meal continues...

Chris Bosh: @DwightHoward forgot to ask u. Can u even understand the man to ur right?

Is it a different language or a thick accent? We can only guess.

Dwight Howard: @chrisbosh lol I can't understand nobody but u. Lol

The two people who CAN understand each other aren't talking to each other, they are using Twitter to communicate while thousands of people stateside follow along. Note to the NBA, next time send a copy of Rosetta Stone and a "So You're Going to Travel Abroad" to help NBA Ambassadors....blend in a little better.

Dwight Howard: @chrisbosh this man asked ya boy do he want still water. He said no I want flat. Lol. They the same thang lol hahaha wow.

So Mr. Howard isn't completely out of his element. He knows how to order non-carbonated water. I'm not sure the incredulous "hahaha wow" is warranted... Oh, you want to know what's even more embarrassing than not know what 'still water' is? Read on...

Chris Bosh:@DwightHoward hahaha! U remember that dude that farted at baggage claim earlier? Was that rude? Lol

Yes Chris, it was rude. But not as rude as Twittering about it during dinner. But we'll let it slide this time.

Dwight Howard: @chrisbosh ooops that was me. Lol. I blamed it on that dude lol

I'm shaking my head and thinking of tomorrow's NY Times front page, "South Africa has broken all diplomatic ties with the US after accusations of..."

Chris Bosh: There's nothing I love more than a free meal!

Mr. Bosh just had to take a time out to let everyone know how much he loves the free vittles. Quality is not mentioned, but apparently the price is right. Quick note: Chris Bosh will make $15,799,912 this season. Hey, it's a recession. Finally Mr. Howard's previous Tweet sinks in and Mr. Bosh becomes indignant...

Chris Bosh: @DwightHoward that's messed up man. I really got mad at that guy. Then YOU blamed it on him!

Keep in mind that this incident occurred in baggage claim, so the first wheels off moment on this trip occurred before they'd made it through customs.

Dwight Howard: @chrisbosh I didn't fart lol. I gotta fart now though.

Mr. Howard's credibility is suspect at this point. I also have to wonder if they both realize this conversation is public and that @username is not the same thing as a direct message to @username.

Chris Bosh: @DwightHoward well, do me a favor and tell me so I can get out the way. The airport was bad enough

I'm at a loss for words at this point.

Just to give you some perspective on the spectrum of NBA player Tweets, while Mr. Howard and Mr. Bosh are hard at work on flatulence-gate in South Africa, Chris Paul is announcing the release of his children's book...

Chris Paul: RT @JenniferKeene: Help put Chris Paul's children's book on the NY Times best seller list by pre-ordering a copy of "Long Shot" now.


But back to Africa...

Dwight Howard: @Baron_Davis africa

Apparently Mr. Davis is following along at home and wants to know where all this is going down. I follow Mr. Davis as well but didn't see a Tweet from him asking where they were so I assume he sent a DM to Mr. Howard.

Baron Davis: @chrisbosh how long are yall down there? sounds like you and @dwighthoward are having a bit of an adventure...LOL

You don't say...

Chris Bosh: @dwighthoward I don't know about u but I'm ready to lay it down... Pause

Mr. Bosh is running out of steam. But Mr. Davis suggest that things could just be getting started...

Baron Davis: @DwightHoward Superman in the motherland... you gonna get out and do a safari... I hear Jo'burg is crazy...

Yes indeed Mr. David. And it sounds like it got a little crazier with the arrival of Mr. Howard and Mr. Bosh.

See what I mean? Can you imagine a schmoe like me getting a hold of a conversation like that five years ago? Even two years ago? I could base this entire blog off of Tweets from NBA players. Only for real press could have done that and with the way old media is suffering these days, there may not have been any US press there.

No doubt there will be more Twitter related articles in the future.

NBA Players on Twitter can be found here: HoopsHype link.

Oh, and just in case you don't believe that this actually occurred, here are the links to the Tweets themselves:

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3690409686

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3690443665

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3691083800

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3692737090

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3694259094

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3694644677

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3694735722

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3694766397

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3694902258

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3694996375

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3695059765

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3695281108

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3695394693

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3695471854

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3695650045

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3695701438

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3695887776

http://twitter.com/Oneandonlycp3/statuses/3696000287

http://twitter.com/DwightHoward/statuses/3696268353

http://twitter.com/Baron_Davis/statuses/3696273716

http://twitter.com/chrisbosh/statuses/3696283100

http://twitter.com/Baron_Davis/statuses/3696698367

Misc Stats

Compiling stats is not easy. But hey, if I'm going to throw down hot sports facts I better have some numbers to back them up right? If I didn't have the numbers then I'd just be another blow hard shooting his mouth off. The stat compilation goes on but it's getting close to complete. Soon I will have it all at the push of a button. In the mean time, I have a few nuggets I can pull out of the pile and share with you, my fellow basketball geeks.

Quick aside, in Lie to Me's episode called the Moral Waiver Dr. Lightman is corrected when he refers to a college basketball star as a "ball player". "Ball players" play baseball, not basketball. The term "baller" can be used when referring to a basketball player, but never "ball player". It's not the hoop way.

On with the stats. In direct violation of journalism 101 I am going to start with the boring ones first. I reward persistence and I invite the impatient to move on...

All team statistics used in this post are based on rosters as of 8/16/2009.

Here are all 30 NBA teams, oldest to youngest:

Team	Avg Age.
Dallas Mavericks	28.910787
San Antonio Spurs	28.624109
Boston Celtics	28.362064
Cleveland Cavaliers	27.674183
New Orleans Hornets	27.639409
Washington Wizards	27.628375
Orlando Magic	27.462764
Chicago Bulls	27.422700
Denver Nuggets	27.379177
Houston Rockets	27.240924
Los Angeles Lakers	27.121601
New Jersey Nets	26.859360
Indiana Pacers	26.792201
Minnesota Timberwolves	26.718786
Miami Heat	26.698629
Los Angeles Clippers	26.644422
Phoenix Suns	26.609588
Milwaukee Bucks	26.549118
Detroit Pistons	26.429293
Charlotte Bobcats	26.252282
Toronto Raptors	26.133659
Atlanta Hawks	26.017807
New York Knicks	25.920758
Utah Jazz	25.869967
Golden State Warriors	25.839830
Philadelphia 76ers	25.605250
Portland Trail Blazers	25.211207
Sacramento Kings	24.932876
Oklahoma City Thunder	24.564382
Memphis Grizzlies	24.406111

The Mavericks are the oldest team in the league, but not by much. And who cares? Take a look at this list. Notice anything about the twelve oldest teams? Eleven of them were playoff teams. Of the four teams that made the conference finals last year, all four are among these twelve oldie but goodie teams. The one playoff exception are the wizened Washington Wizards. But with a healthy Gilbert Arenas, we might see all of the twelve oldest teams make it to the second season.

Let's move on. Here are the teams in order from tallest to shortest:

Team	Avg. Height
Memphis Grizzlies	6' 8"
Oklahoma City Thunder	6' 8"
Cleveland Cavaliers	6' 8"
Charlotte Bobcats	6' 8"
Detroit Pistons	6' 8"
Sacramento Kings	6' 8"
New York Knicks	6' 8"
Los Angeles Lakers	6' 8"
Utah Jazz	6' 7"
Houston Rockets	6' 7"
Washington Wizards	6' 7"
Philadelphia 76ers	6' 7"
Indiana Pacers	6' 7"
San Antonio Spurs	6' 7"
Phoenix Suns	6' 7"
Portland Trail Blazers	6' 7"
New Jersey Nets	6' 7"
Minnesota Timberwolves	6' 7"
Milwaukee Bucks	6' 7"
Atlanta Hawks	6' 7"
Toronto Raptors	6' 7"
Miami Heat	6' 7"
Orlando Magic	6' 7"
Denver Nuggets	6' 7"
Los Angeles Clippers	6' 7"
Boston Celtics	6' 7"
Dallas Mavericks	6' 7"
Chicago Bulls	6' 7"
New Orleans Hornets	6' 7"
Golden State Warriors	6' 6"

One of the oldest maxims in basketball is, "You can't coach height." It's better to be tall team than a short team all else being equal. This is as true today as it was in the way back. The taller players now are not just metaphorical posts in the key. A lot of them have moves that seven footers were not making 15 years ago. Some of them are doing things with the ball that point guards weren't doing 15 years ago. The only way to cover a quick 6'10" to 7' tall player is to stick another quick 6'10" or so player on them. The weird thing is, of the seven tallest teams, six of them are not any good. Cleveland is in the top seven because of the Shaq signing. Take away the Cavs and you only have one playoff team in the bunch and that was the 8th seeded Pistons.

Here's the list of teams by weight (heaviest to lightest)

Team	Avg. Weight
Cleveland Cavaliers	233
Utah Jazz	233
Atlanta Hawks	231
Memphis Grizzlies	230
Houston Rockets	229
Boston Celtics	229
Los Angeles Lakers	229
New York Knicks	228
Miami Heat	226
Charlotte Bobcats	226
Oklahoma City Thunder	225
Denver Nuggets	224
San Antonio Spurs	224
Indiana Pacers	224
Orlando Magic	224
Minnesota Timberwolves	224
Detroit Pistons	224
Washington Wizards	223
Los Angeles Clippers	223
Phoenix Suns	222
Sacramento Kings	222
Philadelphia 76ers	221
New Jersey Nets	221
Dallas Mavericks	221
Milwaukee Bucks	219
Toronto Raptors	218
New Orleans Hornets	217
Chicago Bulls	216
Portland Trail Blazers	216
Golden State Warriors	212

Shaq already has the Cavs #1 in a category and the season has not even started yet. Unfortunately, the Dungeon Master die roll predicts the Cavs will not make the playoffs. The Warriors are the shortest and the lightest team. If you have to fit a bunch of NBA players in a small two door, put the players from Golden State in the back seat.

So there's your baseline demographics for each team. Here's a few more tidbits for you.

When Memphis and Sacramento face off on November 2nd, I'm pretty sure that it will be the first time a player from Israel has played against a player from Iran in an NBA game. Hamed Haddadi from Iran will suit up for Grizzlies and Omri Casspi from Israel will suit up for the Kings.

How hard is it to make it in the NBA if you are not a first round pick? It's pretty difficult. For all the grief that top draft picks take for being "busts", most players that are not top picks don't make it at all. Currently, there are 392 players listed across all 30 team rosters. 154(40%) of them were taken in the top 10. That's right. The lion's share of NBA roster spots go to players who were top 10 in their respective drafts. 263 (67%) current NBA players were taken in the first round. That does not leave a lot of room for your second rounders and NBDL types. Currently, only 88(22%) players in the NBA were taken in the 2nd round. Only 41(10%) players went un-drafted but later signed with teams.

Where do these players come from? I was a little surprised when I tallied the results. For all the grief that Duke takes, there are more players currently in the NBA from Duke than from any other school. Here's how the top five NBA "sources" break down:

1. Duke - 14 players.
2. UCLA - 13 players.
3. Connecticut - 12 players.
4. Arizona - 11 players.
5. North Carolina - 11 players.

Oak Hill Academy (Mouth of Wilson, VA) is the leading high school source of NBA players with 3 (Josh Smith, Stephen Jackson and DeSagana Diop). The country with the most players in the NBA (other than the US) is France with 7. Serbia, Spain and Italy each have 5 and Argentina has 4.

So that's where they come from...but where do they go? Now this list next is mainly for just "hmmm" purposes. There really isn't much you can take from it because general managers and owners can change. But I think it's interesting. Here is list, from most to least, of which teams draftees are still in the league:

Team	# in League
CHI	21
LAL	19
POR	18
SEA	17
UTH	17
PHO	17
WAS	17
LAC	17
MIL	17
MIN	17
GSW	17
BOS	16
NJN	16
DET	16
DEN	15
ATL	14
CHA	14
MEM	14
SAC	14
SAS	13
PHI	13
CLE	13
HOU	13
MIA	12
IND	11
ORL	11
NYK	10
TOR	10
DAL	7
NOR	5
OKC	5
VAN	3

Chicago has had some good drafts over the years with 21 players still in the league. New Orleans, Oklahoma and Vancouver aren't really last because each of those franchises have moved. They should be matched up with Charlotte(Hornets), Seattle and Memphis. Dallas is actually in last place. Only seven players drafted by the Dallas Mavericks are currently in the league. The next fewest totals are for the Knicks and the Raptors, neither of which are known for having stellar drafts. Based on this list that Dallas has built it's current team from trades rather than from draft picks...or a lot of the players Dallas has selected over the years just haven't worked out.

But let's look further....What kind of players comprise each team? Who as the most 1st rounders on their roster?

Team	1st Rnd	2nd Rnd	Not Drafted
Oklahoma City Thunder	12	1	1
Dallas Mavericks	11	2	3
Toronto Raptors	11	2	2
Phoenix Suns	11	2	1
New Orleans Hornets	11	1	1
Sacramento Kings	11	0	1
San Antonio Spurs	10	5	0
New Jersey Nets	10	5	0
Los Angeles Lakers	10	2	1
Portland Trail Blazers	10	1	0
Boston Celtics	9	4	0
Indiana Pacers	9	4	0
Washington Wizards	9	3	2
Memphis Grizzlies	9	3	1
New York Knicks	9	3	1
Los Angeles Clippers	9	3	0
Detroit Pistons	9	2	2
Chicago Bulls	9	1	4
Charlotte Bobcats	9	1	2
Philadelphia 76ers	8	4	0
Golden State Warriors	8	3	2
Denver Nuggets	8	0	3
Houston Rockets	7	8	1
Orlando Magic	7	5	0
Miami Heat	7	2	4
Atlanta Hawks	7	1	2
Milwaukee Bucks	6	6	2
Utah Jazz	6	6	1
Minnesota Timberwolves	6	5	3
Cleveland Cavaliers	6	5	2

The Thunder are at the top of the list because they routinely finish close to last in the conference. They are guaranteed a 1st round pick near the top. As we saw previously, those picks are more likely to stay in the league. So lets put them aside for the moment. Who has the most picks after OKC? Dallas (tied for 2nd with 11). Interesting. It would appear that the Dallas front office isn't the best at drafting players, but that somehow they manage to accumulate lots of 1st round picks anyway. Donnie Nelson's mind and Mark Cuban's wallet have done a lot for this team.

The Cavs are tied for the least number of 1st round picks with 6. Now that I think about it, drafting Lebron James just about guaranteed that the Cavs were going to start picking lower in the draft because they would start finishing higher in the standings. Once you get to the level they Cavs are it, you don't get great picks any more (barring a trade of course).

The Rockets have the most 2nd round players with 8. It's all moot though because of Houston's injury troubles. Miami and Chicago are tied for the most non-drafted players with 4 and both are play offs teams.

So there are my stats. I'm still working on good compilation methods that don't violate various terms of service (not too many anyway).

My next post will be about Twittering NBA players. No, not the train wreck Twitter accounts that have already been shut down (and talked about ad naseum). I'm talking about really good stuff. Like Kevin Durant tweeting while watching the first Star Trek movie. Here's a sample:

RT @KevinDurant35: if your ship run outta gas n space..where would u refuel at?

Thus sayeth the Dungeon Master

The die have been cast. The Basketball Geek rolled, calculated and divined what lies ahead in the 2009-2010 NBA season. There are many surprises. In fact, there are so many surprises that one might suspect the methods used to arrive at final prediction. I could have played it safe and picked Lakers/Cavs (that worked well last year...right) or I could take Lakers/Celtics so the NBA can run countless adds reminding us that they have the biggest rivalry in all of basketball...yawn. Who gets excited about that? I mean other than Laker, Cav and Celtic fans? (That's actually a lot of people....note to self....do a pro Laker/Cav/Celtic post in the near future). So this is what I have come up with. According to my trusty d20, the NBA season will play out like this:

In the Eastern Conference there will be some new comers to the playoff bracket. Indiana and Detroit will take the places of Philadelphia (who will finish 10th) and the '09 conference champions, the Orlando Magic (who will just miss the playoffs in 9th place). The rest of the seedings will go like this:

1. Atlanta
2. Detroit
3. Miami
4. Indiana
5. Chicago
6. Boston
7. Charlotte....???
8. Cleveland (I guess Lebron decides to play baseball).

In the Western conference, Phoenix will finish 9th and Utah 10th. That's possible I guess. The rest of the seedings will play out like this:

1. Dallas (I swear it was random)
2. Golden State
3. Los Angeles Lakers
4. New Orleans
5. Denver
6. Portland
7. San Antonio
8. Houston (Yao & McGrady come back early?)

The d20 might have been a little crazy with picking Houston to finish ahead of the Suns and Jazz. Maybe it knows something we don't know.

So who wins the whole thing? I've got that too. Here's how the d20 predicts the playoffs will come out:

---

Conference Quarter Finals

East

• Atlanta over Cleveland in 6
• Detroit over Charlotte in 6
• Boston over Miami in 5
• Indiana over Chicago in 5

West

• Dallas over Houston in 7
• Golden State over San Antonio 6
• Portland over Los Angeles Lakers in 6
• Denver over New Orleans in 6

---

Conference Semi Finals

East

• Indiana over Atlanta in 7
• Boston over Detroit in 7

West

• Dallas over Denver in 7
• Portland over Golden State in 6

---

Conference Finals

East

• Detroit over Indiana in 6

West

• Portland over Dallas (told you it was random) in 5.

---

And finally....what does the Dungeon Master's d20 predict for the NBA Finals in 2010?

• Detroit vs. Portland and Portland comes out on top in six games.

There you have it. Portland will be your 2010 champion. Is it a gutsy call? You bet. Is it a safe call? Absolutely not. But I'm going to put $10 down right now on Portland and Detroit in the finals because if that hits, I can retire.

For the record, I'm not a real Dungeon Master so it's possible that I rolled the d20 incorrectly. So...if the predictions turn out to be wrong, you can blame it on my lack of skill.

Summer of '09

"When I look back now, that summer seemed to last forever..."

Will the '09-'10 season start already? It seems like ages since the Lakers won the championship and the Recession of 08-09 was named MVP of the Finals. You read that right. Kobe hoisting the trophy was for the unwashed masses who tuned in to watch LeBron vs. Kobe only to realize, sometime in the 3rd period of game two, that Orlando was in the Finals and not Cleveland. For people that out of touch, the crowning of an economic phenomenon as the MVP would have been too much for them to handle. So they gave the trophy to Kobe but the economic down turn was putting the recess in recession when they got back to the hotel to celebrate. Everyone knew who the night belonged to.

It's no joke. The Memphis Trade was made purely for financial reasons brought on by the real estate bubble, the stock market crash and something called "toxic debt". Pau Gasol was the missing piece and until one of those draft picks turns into a 1st team All NBA player, I will hereto fore refer to the Memphis Grizzlies as the Lakers Farm Team (LFT). The Lakers had a good chance of winning anyway. As Dave Moss said in Glenngary Glenn Ross, "The rich get richer, that's the law of the land." The money train stopped and the checkbook in Memphis snapped shut. Can you imagine the shock of the players who were sent to Memphis? Kwame Brown and Aaron McKee walked into the Grizzlies locker room and found a handwritten note taped to their chairs. It went something like, please throw your uniform on the floor only if you need it washed. Otherwise, hang it on the hook in your locker so practice jerseys and game uniforms are not washed unnecessarily. Aaron looked at Kwame and said, "We're in Kansas." You think I am joking? I am. But you know what isn't a joke? Memphis was trying to give it self room to maneuver with a lower payroll and all those draft picks so they could build for the future. To do that you need scouts right? Well guess who got let go in Memphis? Yup, they released their entire scouting staff. So the LFT continues to struggle but fortunately they drafted Marc Gasol (that's Pau's brother) so that in a few years, when Pau is retiring and the Lakers need an all star for some draft picks and cash, Marc will be ready to make the jump to the big leagues.

But I'm over it. Really. So the Lakers won again and it looks like they could win again next year. I say "could" because championships cannot be won in October and the sure cannot be won in August. Prognostication winds up being a lot of Bovine Scatology. That's why they play the games. That's why Detroit beat LA (almost swept them) in 2004. That's why Golden State beat Dallas in the 1st round of 2007. That's why Orlando was in the Finals this year. Orlando? In the Finals? Not only did they beat Cleveland but they almost swept them. If Lebron does not make that miracle shot at the end of game two, I think that would have been it (Even though they lost the series, I still like watching that play. Hedo was thumping his chest in Lebron's house just a wee bit early on that one). I am not sure the basketball gods will smile on his departure to Toronto. The basketball gods are difficult to fathom but there are two things that have been shown time and again:

1. The basketball gods do not favor those who bolt to a weaker team for mammon.
2. The basketball gods do not favor those who bolt to a contender to try and squeeze in a championship before the golden years arrive.

Those are guidelines, but for the most part I think they hold true.

As far as the off-season goes, the story that's received the most ink is Stephon Marbury filmed himself for 24 hours. Apparently it's big news when a former all star eats a petroleum product live, looks at the camera and says, "Vaseline. It's what's for dinner." I still don't know why this story got some much press. I am deliberately not providing links to it in the hopes that anyone who reads this will be too lazy to look it up.

As for the off season moves, it comes down to this. In the eastern conference, the list is:

• Cleveland
• Boston
• Orlando
• Miami
• Chicago

One of those five teams will win the East. If we're lucky we will get a 7 game series in there somewhere that was as good as the Boston/Chicago one was last year.

Here's the list for the Western conference:

• Denver
• San Antonio
• Portland
• Dallas
• New Orleans

One of those five teams will win the West. Oh yeah, forgot one:

• Utah

One of those six teams. Okay, seriously, Utah is not on the list. Here's the team I forgot to add:

• Los Angeles Clippers

Do you really need me to add the Lakers to this list? They are at the top of everyone elses list. Do I have to have it as well for the sake of Jungian Synchronicity? Fine. Scratch the Clippers.

• Los Angeles Lakers

The West is going to be super tight once again and the Lakers will probably make it to Finals again but the approach will not be easy. It's going to be 2009 all over again. Only six games separated the 2nd seed from the 8th seed then. It's going to be more of the same this year only I don't think Los Angeles will have an 11 game cushion. But what do I know? Since this blog is run by a geek I'm going to do what any self respecting geek would do...I will get out the D&D dice set and roll for play off seeding and playoff wins all the way through to the championship game. The results will be posted as the Official 2010 Season Picks for the Basketball Geek. But wait! There's more! I will also be reviewing the Week in Twitter (WIT) for NBA players.